~Journey to Adventure~

I saw my lung doctor yesterday. I really like that man! He truly cares! He took the time to explain findings and unknowns. He asked how I was doing. Looking at my husband and youngest son, I said, "I want to be here for these guys." His eyes watered as he approached me and took hold of my arm looking at me with compassion. 

After my appointment my head was jumbled with mixed emotions the rest of the day and on into this morning. He had told me it was lung cancer but there may be more. The PET scan would show all. 

My head tossed the words around that I have been given by God...Trust & Hope...Life & Truth...wanting to be here all healthy and at length for my family...at times I would have bursts of tears. I tried to gather my thoughts and put the negative ones all in my mental trash can...getting rid of them...I am not into recycling those thoughts (grins).

Then I would think...we really don't know all there is to know about what is going on with my health yet. Maybe it was all caught really early on and things won't be as bad as they could be. 

Basically I tried not to think yesterday. I came across a neat bible verse that I am picking apart as I see it for me...1 Chronicles 28:20, " David also said to Solomon his son, “Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you until all the work for the service of the temple of the Lord is finished." So how am I picking that apart for me? Simple.

I need to be strong, courageous and keep on doing LIFE! I shouldn't get discouraged! God is always with me! He will never fail me! The temple is not a physical building. The temple is Jesus followers. Jesus is the cornerstone...His followers are the stones that make up the building. We are all part of the temple. So, let that part of the verse sink in! Ponder it.

Anyhow, sometimes I think I am in denial about the cancer...because I don't really know anything about it. I am sure when I see my oncologist and go over everything...reality will truly settle in. Trust me, I'd rather live in my mind of imagination!

So, I really don't have much to say here today. I was mainly keeping occupied in writing to you here today. I do keep busy with life! I really do not look forward to filling my calendar with appointments and treatments (which is already happening). 

I had that "white picket fence" ideal of when I was in my early 50's, I would be enjoying life...doing life...and family! Sure I can enjoy life and family but I thought that I would be healthy and enjoying life.

I am thankful that I had a few good years after breast cancer...and hair...and a hairstyle I really like. I learned to appreciate much more living than prior to breast cancer. 

I can't begin to sort out what lies ahead...so I won't try. People say, "take it one day at a time". That is what I do for that is all I can do. I do have hope for my future. I don't try to figure out what it will be. My past taught me a lot and now this current time in my life is teaching me...Trust...Hope...Life...Truth...Patience...Not to fear the unknown...Resting in God...sort of sitting back and observing; I won't even try to explain that now (grins)

I am thankful for my friends and family who have decided to come along with me on this journey. This time the journey is more of an adventure...so let's call it what it is!